Financial Results - Q1, 2007

Posted on April 2, 2007
Filed Under global domination, satisfaction, Money |

All figures in US$
Period Ending March 31, 2007

Income Statement

Revenue $ 1.56
Expenses $ 737.45

Profit/(Loss) ($ 735.89)

Balance Sheet

Assets

Accounts Receivable $ 1.56

Liabilities $ 0.00

Owner’s Equity

Investment $ 737.45
Profit/(Loss) ($ 735.89)

Net Equity $ 1.56

Management Discussion & Analysis

Since launch this startup has increased its share of the growing blogger audience from 0% to 0.0001%, with the help of a surge in readership near the end of the fiscal quarter. Revenue generation has been disappointing, with an eCPM of $0.27 (compared with the industry average of $2.25). However, the projected growth rate of 100% per quarter should see the company achieve its goal of total global ownership some time in the 2nd fiscal quarter of 2027.

Addendum (and note to self): Proofread first, then publish.

Comments

8 Responses to “Financial Results - Q1, 2007”

  1. twiffer on April 2nd, 2007 11:55 am

    well, you’ve made more money off your blog than i have. so that’s something.

  2. Schadenfreude on April 2nd, 2007 11:57 am

    Well, you know what they say:

    Early to bed, early to rise,
    Work like hell, and advertise    .

    Perhaps if I tried one of those…?

  3. topazz on April 2nd, 2007 12:44 pm

    Because I feel a little bad about not buying my new refrigerator from you, here’s a link to a work safe blog I’m sure you’ll like.

    Enjoy.

  4. Schadenfreude on April 2nd, 2007 1:47 pm

    Funny you should say that…I was just thinking how nice it would be if every reader bought a new fridge every day, I could spend the rest of my life reading poetry in Arabic.

  5. Thomas Paine on April 3rd, 2007 6:30 am

    Are your financial results based on US GAAP (Generally Accepted Accounting Standards), Canadian GAAP, or IFRS (International Financial Reporting Standards)?

    I understand Canada is making the transition to the international standards:

    Link

    Depending on which standards apply, and on the nature of the USD 737.45 reported as expense, it is possible that it could have been capitalized and amortized over its useful life, making the already impressive financial results for this venture even more impressive — likely attracting the attention of some especially keen private equity funds,

  6. Schadenfreude on April 3rd, 2007 9:58 am

    Well, good point.

    This is Canadian GAAP rather than US GAAP (although I was tempted to use Haitian GAAP).

    Under Canadian GAAP, certain kinds of expenditures are capitalized (as they are under US GAAP), but amortized at 100%, not subject to the 50% rule.

    Thanks for asking.

  7. Schadenfreude on April 3rd, 2007 9:59 am

    Addendum: At leaat that was Canadian GAAP back when I used to care.

  8. Thomas Paine on April 3rd, 2007 2:54 pm

    Not like I care either — I just have to pretend to, so the company I pretend to work will pretend to pay me!

    (that whole exercise was a way to rationalize that I was doing something remotely related to my profession LOL)

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